- Graduate from college
- Find a good paying work with really nifty benefits
- Marry the love of your life
- Have kids
- Have a home
The things listed above are the usual goals we are expected to achieve. It’s as if anyone who deviates from this is subject to questioning. Those who did not finish college are looked at differently in comparison to those with diplomas. Women are often pestered by well meaning relatives when she’ll get married. Couples without children? There must be something wrong with them. Though the list is simple and quite easy to achieve, it’s like THESE are the only options and YOU MUST NOT DEFY CONVENTION lest you become a social pariah of sorts.
But say, hypothetically, you do graduate from college and get a decent job. You’re married, have kids, and your home is well kept. What do you do with your life now?
Of course, you work some more to support your family and your home and all that. Perhaps you could take vacations, have a car, and other stuff like that.
But let me rephrase that question. What do you do with YOUR life now? Not your kids’ or your spouse’s, but you. What are the things you will work for, for your personal improvement?
And here, my friend, the possibilities are wide open. Not exactly unlimited, since you know, there will always be constraints, but yeah, you pretty much have a freer rein from this point onwards. You can crochet. Or not. Learn how to bake. Take an online course. Create a flower garden. Blog. Bullet journal. Learn a new sport. Travel to new places. Read more books. Do arts and crafts. Join an organization with a cause. Help a charity. Write a script. Watch vintage movies. Compose a song.
The point is, have something you are passionate about that is all your own. Something that is separate from your responsibilities. Some may take this as being selfish. “You’re a family person now. You’re supposed to take care of your kids and your husband/wife. Self-care? You must be a bad person.” Well let me tell you something. It’s difficult to be a spouse and parent, to give a part of yourself to others, if your well-being is not taken care of. And by taking care of yourself, by doing what you love, you are happier and more capable of taking care of the people you love.
So what do you do after Happy Ever After? You embark on a new adventure, and start anew.